My Gay Son
69- The Matthew Shepard Story (TV 2002) - IMDb
Directed by Roger Spottiswoode. With Stockard Channing, Shane Meier, Wendy Crewson, Kristen Thomson.
I remember the day like it was yesterday. I knew it in my heart and had been blinded by a deep, dark, self denial. My baby boy had always been a tad different. He didn't play with dolls but there was that soft, feminine side to him. He was so passionate about the arts; loved to dance and sing and was always the life of the party. Sure he was a bit different. Aren't all kids though? I could see the look in his eyes, even now. There was a resolve and a sense of peace in his presence. He did not stammer as he said those words slowly and deliberately; words that would change his life and mine.... forever, "Mom, I'm gay", he said with conviction. "Huh," I asked, momentarily stunned. Nothing prepares a parent for such an admission. I was not shocked or sad, disappointed or angry. Confused? No. Perhaps, relieved.
Yes as ironic as it seems, I needed to be confronted with this truth; what was before me all of his life. I knew that my life; no our lives would never be the same. The future flashed before my eyes. For a brief moment I saw dark clouds but oddly so they were quickly replaced by that proverbial rainbow. Maybe it was the look of relief in his eyes. My son was clearly happy and at peace with his admittance/coming out. Even though suspicions over the years made this moment an anticipated or expected one, I guess I had closed my eyes and hoped that it would just all go away. Now, the reality stared me boldly......My son is gay. It's like the sudden realization that you have an artistic edge and the gift of creating awesome pieces of sculpture. It's the moment you recognize, finally, what your life's passion is. It's innate. No one can take it away from you. It's what and who you are. Well this is what and who he always was.
I knew there and then that I was only called to do one thing; be his mother. A parent is called to accept, love unconditionally, validate and support. A parental prerequisite is not to judge one's child but rather to be his/her champion and advocate. So yes, my son is gay but my love for him remains without condition and surpasses all things.
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We always wish many good things for our kids, but wishing doesn't change the reality. We should accept them and love them as they are. All you can do for now is asking god to guid him to what is better for him.
Rated up.
Thank you for taking the time to read this hub. This is something very near and dear to my heart. I truly believe that in a world where our children have to almost fight to be accepted and fit in, that they must first feel that love and acceptance at home.
He's still the same person.... Thanks for sharing.
Thanks Ashantina ! He is really an awesome young man !!
You are a beautiful parent,that your son feels comfortable enough to tell you the truth.
That shows he's being true to himself and true to you.
Can you imagine what courage it took to do this,but he only did it because he wasn't afraid to be upfront with you and knows you love him.
The relief in his eyes said it all.
Great hub!
Voted up!
michelemacwrites, quite obviously, you are a wonderful and loving parent as well as a wonderful and loving person in general. And as you said in so many words, a parent's love for his or her child or children should be unconditional.
This is a very warm and inspirational hub and thank you for publishing it.
Beautiful and sincere story. I think many gays wish they had such understanding and supportive mother as you.
Thank you for sharing this heartwarming story with us. You are both blessed to have each other :)
inspirational , great hub !
He may be gay but who in this day and age is anywhere near perfect, your son may be gay but he also one very unique and very special person. We would all be better individuals if we had his caring heart.
Thanks for supporting your child in such a loving manner.
I am very saddened by the fact that your family is not acccepting of your lifestyle. I advise you to be patient with them. It is a very difficult thing for many parents to come to terms with the fact that their child is gay. Time will usually heal the relationship. In the meanwhile, continue sharing your story. You can find peace and happiness in helping others. Feel free to contact me. :)
Excellent hub. Sounds like he is normal, like any other gay person. I understand about 10% of the population is gay.
Thank you for reading the hub and even moreso for your comment. Yes indeed the gay population continues to grow as more and more persons take the brave step out the proverbial "closet". He is an outstanding young man!
I hope your son knows how lucky he is to have a supportive mother.
A friend of mine is gay and had a very different experience when he came out to his family.
Thank you for sharing your story.
Doctor Kristy, I do hope that over time, your friend's relationship with his family would be healed. It is quite a dynamic to add to any family unit. I share my story in an effort to encourage others who are faced with this gay dilemma. I truly appreciate your kind comments.
Your writing on this moved me to the point of tears, he is lucky to have a mum like you, thanks for lifting my day.
Thank you for reading and commenting. Though it is often difficult sharing our most personal stories, knowing that others will be moved and comforted by them is why we write; to build up and support each other. Again thanks !
Thank you so much for sharing your beautiful story and insight. I have a brother who is gay and watched from afar as he and my parents battled it out. Perhaps if they had read something like this and seen a different perspective, things would have been different.
You are very welcome, Megan. It is a difficult dynamic to add to any family unit and for us parents, it is particularly painful at times. I do hope that there is peace and acceptance regarding your brother/parents. Again thanks !
Many parents have difficulty accepting their children when they are gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender -- especially in the African American and Hispanic communities. This is the reason why I penned two books that help families, friends and Pastors understand and mentor LGBT youth. I commend all parents whom have come to the realization and understanding that each child, no matter what their sexual preference may be is a gift from God, sent here for a Divine purpose. Embracing this truth saves the lives of our children and propels them into their Divine Destiny. We are then able to rejoice over the fact that they have become a blessing to all humanity, sharing their gifts and enriching the world instead of becoming another tragic suicide statistic.
Terry Angel Mason, Global Author
LOVE WON'T LET ME BE SILENT
WWWW.TERRYANGELMASON.COM
I am honored that you took the time to read this hub. I also visited your website and am pleased to see all that you are doing to get this message to the masses. Keep writing; keep preaching !!
Oh my, Michele, this is uncanny!! I wrote a hub about giving unconditional love to ALL, but my hub was focused on a gay boy who came out during his junior year. He was raised a Christian, and my main concern was judgment and how it would push him away from Christ.
You are a wonderful parent loving your son unconditionally, just as Jesus loves all of us.
Thank you so very much for your kind words. You hit the nail on the head, that it is all about unconditional love, as Christ loves ! Certainly uncanny.... my son also came out in his high school junior year ! One of my favorite scriptural quotes is, "Judge not, that ye be not judged." How sad so many others forget this text. Again, thanks for reading and sharing and I am about to read your hub !!
Two other verses that came straight from Christ are "Do unto others as you would have done unto you" and "Love your neighbor as you would love yourself."
I pray that judgmental people have not turned your son away from Christ.
Michele , Couldn't help but read this. To be fair in deciding how to feel : I have always looked at it like this ! Honest to god I thought "what if my daughter , brother , sister came to me ! thats why I voted this awesome! You;re the best mom ....of a fine son!
Thank you so very much for your kind comment. You made my day and made me smile !!!!! Keep hubbing my friend !
Michele, as the web is filled with stories such as yours, more and more people will be forced to realize what they have been taught about the homosexual community is wrong I believe we are getting closer each day to a time when the hate will be a thing of the past for the majority. People such as yourself and Sholland are what the young people need in their life. A souce of support when it doesn't exist at home for the gays, and a voice of reason for the straights. Thanks for sharing and being part of the solution instead of the problem.
Someone on Hub Pages writing under the name Prey or I am whatever you say I am posted a very unnecessarily mean comment to this hub. I have no problem with persons having their personal perspective but I do have a problem with persons bashing others or airing negative views when they have no personal experience on the matter. You walk a day in my shoe, lets talk. When you live in the confines of a box for pete's sakes stay in the confines of said box. This individual has been accused of spamming. Please exercise caution and unfollow her !!
onlinemom1963 12 months ago
It warms my spirit that we have the same insights about raising our beautiful sons. God bless your family!